Saturday Sexcapades: Roof

Sorry I haven’t written a Saturday Sexcapade in quite some time, but what can I say, I’ve been busy!

Most of you know that for the majority of the sexcapades I describe here, I go into rather particular detail about how a location outside of the bedroom might seem ideal in romance novel land, but when you look at the logistics you can’t help but see the obvious downsides. However, when it comes to making whoopie on the roof, you might be surprised to discover I am almost in full 100% support of this locale! Let me explain.

I have lived in quite a few buildings throughout my short life which have had fabulous roof access. In many different countries as a matter of fact. And let me tell you the roof is by far the most underutilized amenity in most any apartment building! I once lived in a building that had a rooftop pool, and I can’t tell you how many times I was the only person up there making use of that thing. Why that is? No freakin’ clue. How does it benefit our romantic lovers who suddenly feel the urge to get down while up on the roof? Simple. You are practically guaranteed a decent amount of privacy.

And now for another added benefit: the view. Our lovers not only get to look out on a sweeping view of a city or countryside, but then when they finally get down to business, well…at least one of them gets to look up at a nice starry sky. Sure, one will undoubtedly get the short end of the stick by having to look down at a bunch of roof tiles/bricks, but maybe they can roll over a couple of times to share.

The final obvious positive to this sexy locale is the fact that there’s usually a siding and/or ledge to the roof which provides the necessary amount of privacy from other people who might be star gazing on their own roof. Let’s face it, once our couple goes horizontal, they probably can’t be spotted by any peeping-tom neighbors. Unless of course the building next to them is significantly taller in height. But even then it’s probably too dark for anyone to see anything!

And now for the one and only obvious downside, and it’s quite the doozy. You better bring some kind of yoga mat or air mattress with you, otherwise you’ll probably be quite sore for the next week or two. After all, every apartment building roof I’ve been to has some rather hard concrete flooring, and that just doesn’t seem like the ideal material to roll around on. Could definitely do some damage to the knees. Also, if you live in a really big city, such as New York, you might want to be quick about it, lest the cockroaches get curious as to why you’re invading their territory. Talk about a mood killer.

So maybe there’s a downside here or there, but overall, I’ve got to give an enthusiastic thumbs up to this sexcapade locale!