I don’t know how I feel about books that start off with a rather depressing opening scene. Maybe it’s because I tend to start new books either right before bed, or I begin new audio books during my walk to work. They simply don’t bode well for a good night’s sleep or a pleasant start to my day!
What’s it About?
At age twenty-one, Auburn Reed has already lost everything important to her. In her fight to rebuild her shattered life, she has her goals in sight and there is no room for mistakes. But when she walks into a Dallas art studio in search of a job, she doesn’t expect to find a deep attraction to the enigmatic artist who works there, Owen Gentry.
For once, Auburn takes a chance and puts her heart in control, only to discover that Owen is keeping a major secret from coming out. The magnitude of his past threatens to destroy everything important to Auburn, and the only way to get her life back on track is to cut Owen out of it. To save their relationship, all Owen needs to do is confess. But in this case, the confession could be much more destructive than the actual sin.
There’s nothing to pull your attention into a novel quite like two teens in love being separated as the one is lying on his death bed, and the other is being forced to return to her home because everyone views their love as a passing teen obsession that will quickly disappear. A tear-filled scene as Auburn and Adam hope to spend just a few more moments in each other’s arms before they say their final goodbye. Forever. My god does anybody have a freakin’ box of tissues around?! Flash toward 5 years and we see one half of our former teenage couple, Auburn, still living a life filled with sadness and the unfortunate influence of Adam’s mother and brother. There’s an aspect of the story I don’t want to give away, but let’s just say she’s constantly desperate to stay in their good graces, and will give up certain freedoms in her life in order to please them.
Auburn has been mourning Adam since his death, but one day as she walks through Dallas everything changes. She comes across a one-of-a-kind art gallery in need of an assistant for the next show taking place that same evening, and the artist, Owen, just happens to be a dashing and charismatic young man who makes Auburn feel something for the first time since Adam’s death. Their connection is immediate, and as the evening progresses neither really wants their time together to end. One of my favorite aspects of the novel was the unique nature of Owen’s artwork. The inspiration for his pieces are people’s confessions which he receives anonymously through a slot by his front door. He manages to bring beauty to some rather dark and personal confessions, and while we don’t see any images on the page we can picture them clearly in our minds. Even though Owen makes a living by painting other people’s confessions, he simultaneously acknowledges that some things are worth keeping secret. Including the fact that he somehow already knows who Auburn is.
A Lack of Confessing
The irony of the title can’t be lost on us. Here is a guy who makes his living based on others providing him with the most intimate of private and anonymous confessions. Yet when it comes to the interactions between Auburn and Owen, both are pretty adamant about keeping the important details of their life a secret from the other. Owen is perhaps keeping a few more whoppers than Auburn is, such as why he missed his first official date with Auburn after the night of the art gallery show. Oh…and the fact that he somehow already knows her from something which happened in their past. At first it seems kind of silly that they are both so close-lipped about such critical details of their lives, and the few times where they seem poised to confess the secrets they’ve been keeping, they are of course interrupted in some way from letting the truth come out.
However, when you actually think about the fact that they’ve only known each other for a period of two days, it makes a bit more sense why they wouldn’t have been so forthcoming with the most intimate and emotion-packed details of their lives. Sure, their connection is immediate, and they feel a sense of intimacy for each other that they’ve never felt with another person before. That doesn’t mean they’re willing to let down all their walls in such a short period of time. As for us as the reader, I must admit that some of the secrets they were keeping were pretty evident, including some of the repercussions of Auburn’s former relationship with Adam, as well as why Owen missed his first date with Auburn. The one secret that remains a big question mark throughout the majority of the story is how exactly Owen recognizes Auburn, yet as far as she knows this is the first time they ever met.
Not to be Taken Seriously
Everyone has always belittled Auburn’s relationships with the men in her life. When it came to Adam, others saw their teenage love as something which would be fleeting, and in the long run a small blip in her life. How could two sixteen-year-olds possibly know what true love is? The fact that Adam’s time on this Earth was limited also implied to those witnessing their love story that they were feeling more for each other than they would have had it just been a typical tale of romance between two teens. Nobody could understand how strong their connection was, and they chose to dismiss it for what it was. It sort of makes you question how old someone must be in order for their feelings of love to be taking seriously.
When it comes to her feelings for Owen, everyone just looks at who they think he is on the outside. A problematic young man who they think is bad news. They don’t try to get to know who he really is, or understand the troubling details of his relationship with his father, as well as the tragic details surrounding his past. In a way, by keeping the details of his past, not to mention the more complicated details of his present, a secret from Auburn she is able to get to know the real him. At one point Owen is on the brink of confessing everything to Auburn, but she asks that he keep everything to himself so that her view of him isn’t tainted by the outside factors of his life that he might not be able to control.
Unfortunately, some of the secrets which Owen’s been keeping do eventually come to light. Even though those secrets don’t change how Auburn feels about Owen, they both realize that those details can still prevent them from finding happiness with each other because for the people in Auburn’s life those secrets are unforgivable acts. They present a black mark on Owen’s character. Auburn’s ability to look past them are not seen as a positive, but rather is viewed as a slight when it comes to her choices in life. In turn, these secrets of Owen’s result in even more secrets, as Auburn must keep her true feelings for Owen hidden from those who hold such power over her life. If they were ever to discover that Auburn still holds a flame for Owen, and has been seeing him without their knowledge, the repercussions could be disastrous for Auburn to ever find a glimmer of independence.
From Start to Finish
The true beauty of this book is how everything comes full circle. It takes a while for us to get there, but eventually we get a flashback to the moment which explains how Owen knows Auburn. It’s a moment we almost didn’t get, as Owen muses how he would never confess to Auburn the truth of how he knows her, since it was actually Adam’s confession to tell. I almost thought the book was going to end on that note, and I was on the verge of a “oh HELL no” expletive. However, our book ends with a flashback for us as the audience to witness, even if Auburn will never know the truth. Which I can’t say I fully agree with, but what do I know?
As we could all probably guess at this point, Owen’s memory of Auburn has to do with the time she was visiting Adam in the hospital when they were all teens. What I wasn’t expecting though was the symmetry of seeing the book open and close with the same scene, with Auburn saying goodbye for the last time to Adam in the hospital before he dies as their families insist she return back home. At the start we saw the scene play out from Auburn’s point of view, but shockingly at the end we see it from Owen’s. It’s a heart-breakingly beautiful scene, and all the more poignant seeing everything that Owen and Auburn have suffered through separately and together since this first moment. To see how it was the impetus for Owen’s artwork, as well as the inspiration for the confessions tied to his pieces, well it freakin’ brought me to tears. Ugly tears. I’m talking quivering chin-lip action with gasping breaths here.
Final Impressions: Owen and Auburn’s relationship is a struggle, and when you think about the book as a whole it’s surprising to realize they’ve only spent a grand total of 7 days together in each other’s company. The rest is spent separated from each other by the drama of their lives, but they’re still constantly thinking about each other during that time apart. Our story comes to a climactic and strong finish as we see Auburn finally stand up for herself, and the flashback scene of Owen and Auburn from 5 years prior provided an emotionally charged ending. I do think the story dragged a bit too long in the beginning, as it attempted to build suspense and mystery surrounding Auburn and Owen’s respective secrets. Unfortunately, because these secrets were fairly predictable it seemed like an unnecessary way to draw out the tale. I think I would have preferred a few more scenes of Auburn and Owen together rather than seeing them lament over the time they were separated.
Smut Level: Nothing too steamy all things considered. Love scenes are filled more with an emotional connection than passionate desire
Get it on Amazon: Click Here. $9.99 Kindle Price. Atria Books. 321 Pages