If You Stay by Barbara Meyers

After so many years away, Joy Laurence is finally returning home to face the parents who turned their back on her. The journey to forgiveness is long and arduous, but there might just be love waiting at the end of the road.

What’s it About? 

A runaway daughter. An unforgiving father. A reluctant artist.

At 18, Joy Laurence took off with the local bad boy who left her widowed, broke and pregnant. Back then her formidable minister father hung up on her when she called home. Now that she’s back, he slams the door in her face. But for her adult daughter’s sake, she is determined to make peace with her family.

Although romance isn’t even on her radar, Joy can’t resist troubled and talented Granger Sullivan’s rough edges and skilled hands. And in his rebellious teenage daughter she sees her own reflection.

Joy’s excitement dies when reconnecting with her past results not only in broken hearts, but broken lives. Including hers.
She could admit defeat and walk away a second time.

But if she stays, can she find a way to reconcile with her loved ones and build the life she wants?

First Impressions

This is the third installment in the Red Bud, Iowa series and surprisingly the entire novel takes place outside of the small Iowa town we’ve come to know so well. Joy Laurence, who is the mother of Devonny from the first book in the series, is returning home to face the past she ran away from years ago. One parent welcomes her back with open arms, but the other continues to hold a grudge for what he deemed an unforgivable mistake made by Joy when she left home. What started off as a battle of wills between daughter and parents has now evolved into one of wife versus husband, as Joy’s mother struggles to forgive her husband for all of the years lost of getting to know their daughter and granddaughter. Joy never could have guessed that by mending ties with her mother it would result in frayed ties between husband and wife. Would it have been better if she’d stayed away?

Even though she’s gone back home with the primary goal of reconciling with her parents, Joy unexpectedly finds a connection, both emotionally and physically, with gruff artist Granger, who just so happened to have a longstanding crush on her when they were young. As they start to dance around their feelings for each other, Joy is also struck by the tenacity of Granger’s daughter who reminds her so much of herself when she was also a rebellious teen. Witnessing the disagreements and verbal sparring between Granger and his daughter makes Joy conjure up memories of similar spats with her own father, and worries if Granger might be on the same road to an irreparable rift with his child. While it was certainly fun getting to know the characters of this new small town, full of their own personalities and complex histories, I can’t help but admit I did miss the friends we’d made back in Red Bud. I tried to think if there was any way the small Iowa town could have been further incorporated into this third story, but upon reflection it made sense that the only way Joy could have confronted her past was by going home.

A Tale of Romance

As Joy tries to navigate the complex relationship with her parents, she also starts to fall for her somewhat surly landlord, Granger. He may appear standoffish on the surface, but beneath this impassive exterior lies a talented artist who is insightfully observant of the world around him. The evolving relationship between Granger and Joy was certainly enjoyable, especially seeing as Granger’s childhood crush has finally come to fruition as an adult, but their romance sort of played second fiddle to the bulk of the other drama going on. Their scenes together were oftentimes a reprieve from the intensity of the book as a whole, providing a seamless chemistry and lightness of fluttering butterflies in the stomach at the start of any new love affair. Whereas we really couldn’t tell how or if other relationships might be resolved, the attraction between Granger and Joy was something we could rely on.

Resolving the Past and the Present

Every book in this series has provided us with an emotional exploration of various relationships, and this third novel continues that theme as we dive deep into the complexities of family dynamics, marriages, teenage hormones, and the intricacies which can surround father/daughter relationships. The irony was not lost on the fact that Joy’s father, Art, who is the minister of this small town, could often guide the members of his flock through their own familial issues, but when it came to those within his own household he struggles to move forward on the path towards forgiveness. Not only to forgive the daughter who he feels brought shame upon their family, but also to forgive himself for the grave mistake of turning his back on her when she tried to reconnect.

We ultimately come to learn that the animosity he’d always felt towards Joy stemmed from the fear of almost losing his wife, Marcy, through her difficult pregnancy with Joy. She’s always represented the thing that threatened to take the love of his life away from him. When she finally makes a reappearance in their lives, Art’s inability to move on from the past threatens the loss of his wife anyway as she struggles with the knowledge that he prevented years of connection with their daughter and granddaughter. Considering that Joy’s pregnancy with Devonny was such a large component of the rift she faced with her parents, I admittedly would have liked to see Devonny incorporated more into the story of this novel. While we do get a few phone call conversations here and there, as well as a final appearance at the conclusion of the book, I think she could have had a more prominent role here overall. That being said, it’s also understandable that Joy would have had to face her past primarily on her own, rather than relying on Devonny to have a hand in resolving any issues for her.

Similar to the complexities around Joy resolving the tenuous connection with her own parents, it was interesting to see some of the same themes reflected in how Granger and his own daughter, Cassie, needed to confront and mend their own relationship. In both instances, it wasn’t as though the presence of a third character could come in and easily resolve everything with a simple conversation. Joy needed to speak with her parents on her own terms without relying on Devonny to help smooth things over, just like Joy’s parents needed to face each other head on, same as Granger and Cassie needed to do. Particular events and conversations which wove in between all of these characters certainly influenced how they chose to re-evaluate their own situation, but at the end of the day each set of relationships had to traverse their own unique path to ultimate forgiveness.

*A copy of this book was provided for an honest review*

Series: Red Bud, Iowa book 3. 

Final Impressions: This book is an exploration of faith, love and forgiveness. Of all the books in the series so far this felt like the most emotionally “heavy” one of the bunch, as there were a multitude of shaky relationships at play with deep-rooted issues at the heart of them. I often found myself questioning if Joy would ever find absolution with her father, if her parent’s relationship could ever be saved considering so many years of heartbreak, and whether Granger would be able to find a way to reconnect with his daughter. Throughout it all we see love start to blossom between Granger and Joy, and I do wish we could have seen their connection featured a bit more prominently. There were so many different complex relationships to keep track of, and it seemed theirs was sometimes pushed to the side to introduce the others. There was even an unexpected traumatic twist towards the end of the book involving Granger and Joy’s union that I really didn’t see coming, but it felt relatively glossed over in order to ensure the other loose ends of the novel were tied up.

Smut Level: Granger finally has the source of his longstanding crush in his arms, and after so many years of waiting he’s more than ready to show Joy how much he’s always wanted her.

Get it on Amazon: Click Here. $3.99 Kindle Price. 289 Pages

If You Knew by Barbara Meyers

Where are your kids? Turns out they’re at school, but they have a former porn star as a teacher’s aide, and a reformed junkie as a guidance counselor. The beauty of this novel is it will show you why there’s no problem with that situation.

What’s it About? 

In a town filled with lies, is there room for one more? When widow Devonny Campbell arrives in tiny Red Bud, Iowa, she is determined to make a new life for herself and the child she carries. But when her former career in adult films is uncovered, she becomes the catalyst for a nasty political campaign which creates a tornado of controversy. High school coach and guidance counselor Luke Bradshaw knows one strong wind will collapse the house of cards he’s built to contain his demons. He’s falling hard for Devonny in spite of her past. And she might be what trips him up and exposes everything he’s kept hidden. But Devonny and Luke aren’t the only citizens of Red Bud forced to face the judgment of their peers. As the campaign turns vicious, deeply-buried truths are revealed and lifelong relationships are shattered. Can Devonny and Luke stick together? Or will too much truth tear them apart?

First Impressions

There’s nothing better than a romance novel that shatters any of your preconceived expectations, and this novel succeeds in doing that in abundance. The author does a fantastic job at introducing us to these characters in a somewhat slow and natural way. Devonny is a newcomer to the city of Red Bud, trying to find a peaceful haven after losing the love of her life, and locate a place to raise the child she’s just recently found out she’s going to have. Then you have Luke, a friendly local who is more than happy to welcome Devonny to this small Iowa town. He also can’t deny the attraction he feels for this quiet woman who also has a spark about her. At first, they seem completely “normal”, and silly me I thought this book would primarily tell a story of Devonny learning how to move on from her former love to find a romance with someone new. In a way, that’s true. However, we also slowly start to discover that these two characters have some unexpected surprises to share about their respective pasts. Little did I know this book would make me confront my own biases and prejudices, and learn the importance of acknowledging that who a person is now is often more important than who they once were.

The Porn Star and the Junkie

As I previously eluded to, the author gives us a somewhat slow introduction to Devonny and Luke. It doesn’t open up right away with the description of a former porn actress moving to Iowa from LA, soon thereafter meeting a dashing man who also just so happens to be a reformed junkie. Instead, we start off seeing how they are both very friendly, caring people who just want to live a happy life. We’re rooting for them to find happiness with each other, and you can’t help but describe their burgeoning romance as “cute”. Devonny is obviously moving on from the tragic loss of her husband, Jack, to a quick illness, but she realizes that he wouldn’t have wanted her to wallow away in sadness. Especially with a baby on the way. Sure, her romance with Luke might seem a bit quick considering the recent death of her husband, but their chemistry feels so natural you sincerely believe they’re a perfect fit for each other. Luke must learn that Jack will always remain a part of Devonny’s life through their child, and Devonny has some of her own introspection to deal with in order to no longer see her feelings for Luke as a betrayal of the love she felt for her husband.

Only after we see the base of their relationship, as well as the true nature of their characters, do we peel away at some of the details of their past. Devonny appeared in a number of adult films with her husband, and Luke has struggled with a history of alcohol and drugs. I’ll admit, when we first uncover the details of their pasts the irony was not lost on me over the fact that they both work in a high school with children. Doesn’t seem like the most thorough of background checks, amiright? But here is where I truly appreciated this novel. Why should we pass judgement on them for something they’d done in the past? It’s not like Devonny is teaching these kids how to give a good blow job for crying out loud, she’s tutoring them in math! As for Luke, why can’t he use the story of his triumph over drugs as something for these kids to admire? They’ve both been on a journey in life, and they’ve each had a few unexpected bumps and curves along the way. When we look at who they are today we find that they’re stronger because of the difficulties they’ve traversed in the past. Not to mention…we also learn they aren’t the only ones in this wholesome little town with secrets.

The Lie of Middle America? 

A seemingly perfect town full of good-natured, respectable citizens. Sure, on the surface. But what happens when we look beneath the polite smiles, and look at the truth of what’s hiding underneath. As it turns out, it’s really a town full of secrets and lies. Let’s face it, we all have certain aspects of ourselves or our pasts which we’d prefer to keep hidden from others. Nobody’s perfect, and the citizens of this small Iowa town might like to think they live in an oasis that espouses family values, but it’s all an illusion. In a way, it was an illusion for Devonny as well when she chose to settle here, hoping that her previous career as an adult film actress wouldn’t become widely known to her neighbors, and she could find the perfect place to set up a home. Some secrets are more potent than others, including cheating spouses and hidden sexualities, but what’s most surprising is the fact that some of these people with their hidden lies are the same ones to judge Devonny when her past comes to light.

We’ve all heard a variation of some quote or another about why this is the epitome of hypocrisy. Don’t judge others lest ye be judged. Those who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. Well, the people in this town basically live in a glass dome, and they’re apparently in the mood to chuck a few boulders in Devonny’s direction. We question if Devonny will be able to remain strong in the face of so much hatred, or if she’ll choose the easy way out and simply escape to another town where nobody knows her past. Let’s just say she’s not one to give up. She’s a fighter, but she’s also poised, friendly, and not one to lose her cool when being accused of corrupting the youth of Red Bud. Eventually Devonny realizes she has a number of allies on her side, and all of them take it upon themselves to show this town that it can be easy to judge someone for what they may have done in the past, but it’s more about how that past influenced who they are today.

The Root of the Problem

“We all have a journey…And everyone has mountains and valleys and stumbling blocks. But there’s a purpose in everything. It isn’t always good versus bad. Everything isn’t white and black.” This is where the author shocked me yet again by applying this logic to our supposed “villains”. There are a number of key characters who seem determined to run Devonny out of town. They are characterized as the bad guys you hate to hate, who seemingly have no redeeming qualities. While we root for Devonny and Luke to succeed, we simultaneously root for these characters to fail. However, if we apply the same moral of the story to our villainous characters as well, we learn to acknowledge that their determination to see Devonny ruined “isn’t always good versus bad.” Just like Devonny and Luke, our hateful characters have pasts and motives of their own. By the end of the novel I wouldn’t say we necessarily come to love these characters who wanted to ruin Devonny’s chance of happiness in Red Bud, but we come to understand that everyone has a history of their own which influences the decisions they make in life. Sometimes they go down the wrong road, but that doesn’t mean they can never find their way back.

*A copy of this book was provided for an honest review*

Series: Red Bud, Iowa, Book 1. I’m intrigued to continue on with this series. This first novel was full of engaging characters, and it’d be interesting to see what story each of them might have to tell.

Final Impressions: This book will really make you rethink how you look at other people, and cause you to pause before you pass judgement on others. The beauty of the moral lesson presented in this romance is that it never feels like you’re being preached to, or made to feel guilty for having those judgments. At times it’s simply our first reaction, but the true test is whether or not we can look beyond those first impressions to see the true nature of a person. It also makes us look at ourselves, and in a way admit our own faults when we try to find faults in others. This was definitely more than the simple “moving on from tragedy” romance I was expecting. We really saw a social message built in as well that I wasn’t expecting, but in the end appreciated.

Smut Level: Two words folks. Pregnancy hormones. Nothing too over-the-top erotic, but you’ll fan yourself a time or two.

Get it on Amazon: Click Here. $3.99 Kindle Price. Sandalstring Productions. 327 Pages

White Roses in Winter by Barbara Meyers

Will one night of romance on the beach turn into a lifetime of happiness?

What’s it About?

The princess. The pauper. And a shotgun…The only thing Jason is focused on is getting through his last year of college. But the instant attraction between him and Kerrie leads to one unforgettable night together. When Kerrie’s wealthy, overly-protective father learns she is pregnant, he arranges a temporary marriage to teach her a lesson about choices and consequences. Jason reluctantly agrees to keep his participation in the plan a secret, because it’s the only way he can safeguard his future and his family. Kerrie is blinded by her romantic fantasy and doesn’t suspect she’s been set up. Meanwhile, Jason guards his heart and vows that when Kerrie leaves with their baby, he won’t beg her to stay. Just when it seems a future together is possible, lies, betrayal and deceit threaten to separate Kerrie and Jason forever. Faced with losing each other and their baby, will their fragile bond be strong enough?

First Impressions

Based on the synopsis, I was surprised to see how this novel actually started. I figured we’d witness the initial attraction between Jason and Kerrie which ultimately lead to her ending up pregnant before the two get married. Imagine my surprise when instead we open on a pill-popping woman named Tiffany who watches on in pure disdain as Jason and Kerrie wander back to her birthday house party after a tumble on a sandy beach. She wants Jason for herself, and although Kerrie is her “friend”, she is filled with an overwhelming amount of hatred towards her for stealing her crush out from under her. Switch to the next scene, and Tiffany is pushed to the background to instead focus on Kerrie discovering her pregnancy, and the progression of her marriage to Jason.

A unique start to be sure considering our meet-cute is introduced through the eyes of a troubled and hate-filled character. Although I must admit this was an interesting way to start off our romantic tale, I couldn’t help but feel that I missed some of the initial connection between Kerrie and Jason seeing as we never really witnessed it directly. The evening’s activities do sort of come together piecemeal throughout the rest of the novel, as we see things from both Kerrie and Jason’s point of view. However, considering this is the very first crucial introduction to their relationship, and we see it through Tiffany’s jealousy and contempt, it seems we lost some of the magic which could have helped explain why these two characters felt a connection in the first place. I guess in my humble opinion the moment didn’t receive the proper attention that it deserved considering it’s the foundation and impetus for their entire future together.

An Unnecessary Marriage?

I found myself asking a lot of questions throughout Jason and Kerrie’s relationship, and ultimately I’m not sure they were all answered. Or at least, they left me a bit confused. The first I sort of brushed upon in my intro, which was why exactly these two came together in the first place. Neither are “beach sex” kind of people, so they must have seen something in the other which pushed them to throw their inhibitions to the wind, but again this moment never really had the focus and attention I think it deserved. Especially considering what comes next. Their marriage.

Honestly, I’m still sort of scratching my head over this one. I understand why Kerrie wanted to keep the baby, but I don’t really understand why she felt the need to marry Jason. Couldn’t they try dating for a while? Was a ceremony really necessary? It is sort of implied the marriage was a result of family pressure, specifically from Kerrie’s father, but when he goes to speak with Jason about the prospect of marrying his daughter he openly admits he doesn’t want them to marry. After they do marry her father tries to show Kerrie how unfit Jason is as a husband, and takes some rather drastic steps in an attempt to keep them apart. The whole situation just seemed to constantly contradict itself.

As for Jason, he acknowledges to himself that he wants to be a part of his child’s life, whether his marriage to Kerrie succeeds or fails. Yet when Kerrie first moves in after their wedding Jason actively ignores her, and tries to limit their interaction whenever possible. I just had trouble understanding the dynamic in the beginning. Wouldn’t he want to be somewhat agreeable if he plans to stay in his child’s life forever, and this is his child’s mother? That being said, I’m happy to say that eventually their tale of romance all comes together for a fantastic conclusion. You really come to root for these two to succeed as a couple, and when they finally learn how to talk to each other and open up about their feelings? Well you just wanna cheer for their success. We see how they find strength when they’re together as a unit. As a family. And nothing could possibly keep them apart.

The Disapproving Parents

That being said, Kerrie’s mother and father certainly go to some extreme lengths to try and keep these two apart. On the one hand, I found it really difficult to understand how her parents could be so cruel in their attempt to keep Jason away from Kerrie. She’s pregnant for crying out loud, you really wanna risk upsetting her because you don’t approve of the lad? When they do manage to separate the two of them at one point in the story it’s clear how distraught Kerrie is at the separation, and yet they continue to keep her locked away from him like a defenseless animal in a cage. I feel like my parents would be too fearful of my wrath to ever pull this kind of stunt if I were to catch on to their antics.

Although I had such trouble picturing this scenario with any sense of reality to it, I must say on the other hand I could totally understand it, 100%! It really wasn’t until the very end though that it all came together for me. Throughout the whole thing I kept thinking, what kind of dick parents are these?! To keep their daughter miserable. To be so unnecessarily over-protective. But then, when father and daughter finally have their heart-to-heart conversation at the end? Man, it got to me! As a daddy’s girl, and as the baby of my own family, it finally made sense. To see the lengths two parents would go to in the hopes of protecting their baby from harm. For them to eventually go through the sad realization that she’s not a baby anymore. They have to let her go and live her life. I must say, it was a frustrating road to travel, but in the end it had the most touching and heartfelt of conclusions.

The Intermittent Villain

Every once in a while throughout this tale of pregnancy, family drama and romance we would see an unexpected reappearance of Tiffany. Don’t tell me you forgot about her already! Our troubled “friend” of Kerrie’s who first witnessed the connection of our lovebirds, and was filled with overwhelming hatred for Kerrie at the sight of it. With every reappearance of Tiffany throughout the book we see that her feelings of ill-will and increased pill-popping is building up to something momentous. While our tale does start and end with Tiffany, thereby coming completely full-circle, I couldn’t help but feel that her villainous story-line was slightly out of place, or maybe unnecessary.

Kerrie and Jason are dealing with enough drama for crying out loud. They’re trying to figure out how to live with each other, not to mention they have a baby on the way, and her disapproving parental units are acting up. This element of a covetous ex-friend took things slightly over the top for me. Her character definitely brought some high-level suspense to the story, but I think the story also would have felt more realistic without this component to it. Especially considering it was really hard to comprehend why Kerrie and Tiffany would have been friends for so long. Let’s just say her bouts of crazy go back quite a long time!

*A copy of this book was provided for an honest review*

Series: Stand-alone romance

Should you read it? It did take a while for Kerrie and Jason to form an emotional bond.  The scenes of them getting to know each other and playing house after their wedding drag on for a bit of an awkward pace. I also wish Kerrie’s pregnancy had been featured more prominently. While it was what brought them together at the start, the details of her being pregnant were pushed to the side that I sort of forgot she was even pregnant at times! If only they could have gone to some doctor’s appointments together, experienced some emotion at seeing that first sonogram photo, go through strange cravings, changing dress sizes, or morning sickness! While we don’t really see any of this, it’s definitely worth sticking around for the end, as this is when the magic of their relationship and Kerrie’s interactions with her parents come to the forefront.

Smut Level: Nothing too overly graphic. There is one kind of awkward scene as they get intimate while Kerrie’s breastfeeding. I feel like having a baby staring at you with big bright eyes while your lover kisses down your throat would sort of kill the mood. But hey, whatever does it for ya!

Get it on Amazon: Click Here. $4.99 Kindle Price. Barbara Meyers LLC. 375 Pages.

What a Rich Woman Wants by Barbara Meyers

Apparently, the rich woman in this novel wants the exact same thing I do: a hunk of man muscle with tight abs and a firm tushy.

What’s it About? 

Right about the time Lesley Robinson’s father’s stroke left her in charge of his Fortune 500 company, she adopted her housekeeper’s sick baby and divorced her philandering husband. She’s survived the past six years by building an impenetrable wall around her emotions. But when a hunk of a sheriff’s deputy turns up at her office to apply for a grant from the company’s foundation, her distrust of men and relationships takes a direct hit. Niko Morales clawed his way out of gang life to build a new one grounded in law enforcement and a passion to help disadvantaged youth. So, Lesley needs a companion for an upcoming social occasion? He’s no gigolo, but for his community center, and maybe for her, he’ll wear the monkey suit. Without any apparent effort at all, Niko sneaks under Lesley’s cool façade, shaking up everything she believed about herself. But when their relationship is threatened by the sins of others, they’ll both have to step up—and out of their comfort zones. Or they’ll lose the one thing they want most: each other.

First Impressions

I must say that I was surprised, and happily so, that for a romance novel featuring a sexy sheriff’s deputy, we didn’t have any sex scenes featuring handcuffs. Mighty refreshing. Just because there are no restraining accessories used during their sexual activities doesn’t mean that they didn’t have any hot scenes together. Far from it. The fact that Lesley was a strong-willed business woman meant that she had no problem making the first move. Actually, it was more like the first shove up against a wall. Niko may have let her take control for a bit, but it didn’t take long for him to run the show.

Inner Struggles vs. Outward Battles

Lesley’s ex-husband was a total man-whore  who managed to knock up one of their employees. In an act of compassion, Lesley adopted the child when the mother was deported, and eventually kicked her hubby to the curb. However, she never really connected with the child, Ricky, and when Niko makes such a quick connection with him Lesley vows to be a better mother. In spite of this declaration, the novel definitely focuses more attention on Niko and Lesley’s budding romance between the sheets rather than the relationship with her son. Honestly, I think her attempts to reconcile with Ricky should have been featured more prominently in the story.

When Ricky’s birth mother, Maria, comes back on the scene demanding money and increased contact with her son, we really have a great balance between this suspenseful side of the story, and Niko and Lesley’s romance. Towards the latter half of the book though, our lovebirds have some internal struggles going on where they question whether or not their relationship will last. These two had so much passion within the bedroom, that I really would’ve liked to see some of that heat extend out to an actual argument. Some of you might be asking why I wanted these two characters to have an intense shouting match. Two words people: makeup sex. Instead, they just have internal dialogues with themselves instead of each other. Come on people, communication is key! Once you’re done getting it all out you can go right back to the bedroom again 😉

Stand-Alone? 

Both Lesley and Niko have extensive back stories, but the book sheds much more light on hers rather than his. I felt like we just scratched the surface of some of the issues surrounding Niko’s gang-related past, and I really wanted to delve deeper. That being said, this is the fourth book in the series, so it’s possible that some of the important aspects of what made Niko the man he is today were already covered in a previous book. Now if that’s the case, then I feel a more in-depth summary was needed in this book, or it should have been recommended to read the books in the order which they were published. As it stands, it seemed like we only heard half the story.

*A copy of this book was provided for an honest review*

Series: Braddock Brotherhood, book 4.

Should you read it? Let me put it to you this way, after reading this book I was intrigued enough by the characters that I would consider going back and reading the books that came before. It seems like an interesting series, and i just might have to start from the beginning!

Smut Level: The guy works in law enforcement! In romance novel land that automatically increases the sex appeal by 2 points.

Get it on Amazon: Click Here. $4.24 Kindle Price. Samhain Publishing, Ltd. 219 Pages.