2015 in Review

Last year I read a grand total of 247 books. My goal this year was simple. Read less! And I’m happy to say that I succeeded in my goal by only reading 162 novels.

Overall, 2015 was a great year for “Romance Novels for the Beach”. Not only did I write my 200th post, but my little blog here also turned 1. Still such a young widdle baby. Below are some of my favorite posts and reviews from this last year. I invite you to click on the title if you want to read more!

1. What Do you Have Against Romance?  Not only was this my most viewed post of the year, it was also my absolute favorite to write. As well as the most difficult. You can’t help but notice that there is a stigma against both romance novels, and the people who read them. For some reason, romance books are often considered to be a lesser genre when compared to others, and those who read them can be seen as sex maniacs, or doomed to be lonely cat people. In this post, I address that you shouldn’t be ashamed if you like reading romance, as you aren’t alone, and there are some awesome books contained within such a vast genre.

2. Why I Could Never Date Christian Grey This post came in 2nd place for my most viewed of the year, but I sort of like to think of it as my funniest work to date. Let’s face it, there are a ton of reviews out there of the 50 Shades books and movie. I’ve featured them myself. But how many people out there will write a post using Grey’s lack of wardrobe color and named pencils as reasons to avoid dating him? That would be me.

3. Stalker Theme: Male vs. Female Apparently you all enjoyed this one, as it was my 3rd most popular post of the year. Interesting, considering it isn’t exactly a very fun subject to discuss. In this post I mention the different kinds of stalking we might see in romance novels. Whereas male stalkers can be presented as either our male hero or villain, for some reason female stalkers are almost always written as psychotic cray crays.

4. E-Reader vs. Physical Book Which do you prefer? Personally, I have a rather unhealthy connection with my Kindle. Believe it or not, it’s actually one of the first things I take into account when I go purse shopping: will it fit my Kindle? It’s one of those things I can never leave the house without. Whether you prefer your e-reader or a physical book, just remember to keep reading!

5. My Favorite Books of the Year The books below weren’t necessarily published in 2015, but they were some of my favorite reads of the year. I’ve reviewed some of them, but for others you’ll just have to stay tuned!

• Until Jax by Aurora Rose Reynolds
• Thankful Hearts by Evelyn Aster
• Talking Dirty with the CEO by Jackie Ashenden
• Slightly Tarnished and Slightly Noble by Lilly Gayle
• Seven Sinners Anthology by multiple authors
• One Night of Sin by Elle Kennedy
• Locked, Loaded & Lying by Sarah Andre
• Damaged by Gina Watson
• Forever with Me by Kristen Proby
• Beautiful Secret by Christina Lauren

Well, that’s all for me in 2015. See you again next year!

 

Why I Could Never Date Christian Grey

Kinky sexual proclivities and excessive emotional baggage aside, there are actually a few other reasons why I could never bring myself to date the brooding billionaire should the opportunity arise. Because, you know, that opportunity is just about to present itself. Below are my top 5 reasons which appeared in the book Fifty Shades of Grey, but were definitely ameliorated in the recent film.

1. Lack of Wardrobe Color

My God, have you ever seen a more boring closet? Not including the half-naked man of course. Dull gray everywhere. I mean, you would think that even this guy would like a little splash of red here and there, but no siree. All we have are slightly varied shades of monotonous gray. Even the man’s ties are boring! I’m sorry, but any guy who doesn’t have at least one humorous holiday tie in his collection isn’t worth my time. As far as I’m concerned Anastasia Steele, you can have him tie you up all day long with that sad, colorless excuse of an accessory. I won’t fight you for him.

2. The Dude Has Pencils with His Name on Them

What is this, second grade?! When was the last time you had a pencil with your name on it? As if that wasn’t bad enough, he actually gives them out to people! If he’s trying to show off he’s doing a very bad job of it. Sorry, but I’m not impressed with your thin little pencil Mr. Grey. You’re gonna have to do better than that! With all the money he has, he should at least be able to print his name on a freakin’ pen.

3. He Feels Up His Dates in Front of His Parents

Boy didn’t your momma teach you any manners? Don’t make me slap you upside the head, because I will! Sure, he stroked her thigh under the table and out of sight from prying eyes, but talk about inappropriate. It’s called self control, and the only place he should lose it with his girlfriend in his parent’s house is in a discreet upstairs bathroom or hall closet. Any location on the first floor is strictly off limits. This is “Introducing the Chica to Your Parents” lesson 101.

4. He Has a Playroom

Any man who refers to his secret and locked sex room as a “playroom” cannot be taken seriously. If I were making out with a guy, and he stopped mid-fondling to say, “I want to take you to my playroom”, I’d laugh in his face before rearranging my skirt and getting the hell out of there. Sure, the expectation when you hear “playroom” is supposed to be this:

But all I see is this:

Doesn’t really get me in the mood.

5. The Glider

Sorry, but there ain’t no way in hell you’re getting me in one of these.

And that, Mr. Grey, is why we can never be. Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll find someone else.