Masked Hearts by Evelyn Aster

Happy Halloween! Does everybody have their costumes picked out yet? Well dear God I hope so. Otherwise it’s a little late to put something together. I’m gonna be a slutty panda! Why, you ask? Well, I’ve never done the whole slutty costume thing before, and I figured that if I was ever going to do it I might as well do so while I’m young and foolish. I also love pandas, so…yeah. Now on with the review!masked hearts

I love, love, LOVED this book! Did I mention I loved it? Because I did. What we have here is the absolute perfect sweet yet sexy romance novel, all of which is centered around Halloween. I’ll admit, at first I was a little wary about how sexy this book could actually be. After all, our female lead character is a kindergarten teacher who sings in the church choir on Sundays. But once she started debating the merits of having a f*%k buddy versus using her vibrator I was like, “Holy Hell, we’ve got a live one here!”

Sienna is a kindergarten teacher whose fiancé broke up with her at their rehearsal dinner (prick), and Mark is the divorced father of one of her students. The two happen to meet outside of class-time one afternoon at the Holiday Café, and are immediately smitten with one another while drinking some Toil and Trouble lattes. What follows is an addicting story-line wherein Mark has to convince Sienna to take a chance on their relationship, even if she’s scared of being hurt again. They also have some amazing sex, which is so yummy, yet slightly dirty and sweaty. Toil and Trouble indeed!

I’d like to start off by saying that Mark is probably one of the most ideal book boyfriends ever, even if he does come with some baggage of having two kids and a crazy alcoholic of an ex-wife. He never gives up on Sienna though, and is always fighting in her corner. He’s also an amazing father. I feel like sometimes romance novels have difficulty properly incorporating children into the mix. Normally, whenever we have a single parent or divorced parent involved in a budding relationship, their kids are always off doing something else with their ex-partner. Basically, they are never in the picture, which gives dad the perfect opportunity, not to mention time,  to woo a young lass into bed. However, in this book there is the perfect balance of Mark finding the time to be a really cool dad, but also to sweep Sienna off her feet…and against a wall, if you catch my drift. I also love his name. Mark. It’s so sexy and manly. Not like Jace, or Logan, or heaven forbid, Trick. Still can’t get over that one.

At times, this book did make me a bit fidgety. Let me explain. There were moments where so many forces were coming against Sienna and Mark, that I was so anxious and worried that she’d either get fired from her job, or they’d break up. We’ve got an ass of an ex-fiancé, Mark’s bitch of an ex-wife, a lusting teacher who is incompetent at her job, and an annoying principal who refuses to listen to reason. That’s what we call a clusterf*%k ladies and gentlemen. However, even though this book did make me nervous at times, it just goes to show that there was more to the story than hot lovin’. It felt more real, like everything isn’t dancing faeries and butterflies.

I’ve also gotta give it to Sienna, that chica has some ridiculous willpower. She may have made some questionable decisions at times in regards to the return of her ex-fiancé and Mark, but when it came to her teaching and dealing with conniving, backstabbing coworkers, she always remained professional. I’m telling ya, if it were me, I would’ve had a convasation with some people. It’s like a conversation, but you know it’s serious. I also would have taught people the meaning of the phrase bitch-slap, because I would have been slapping some bitches. But alas, Sienna was classy throughout. You go girl!

Overall, this book was nearly perfect. I did find it a little ridiculous that the whole book spans a total of 2 weeks, during which Mark and Sienna decide they will spend the rest of their lives together. You know, there’s nothing wrong with dating for a few months. Maybe try living together, see if he hogs the sheets, drinks milk from the carton, that kind of thing. But you know what, I didn’t even really notice that their relationship was so short because I just loved the rest of the book. It’s funny, sexy, and frustrating at times, but in a good way. Halloween and the Holiday Café are also constant features throughout the book, so if you’re looking for something festive to read this weekend, or a way to entertain yourself while you pass out candy to trick-or-treaters, then go here to get yourself a copy of this fun read.

*An ARC of this book was provided for an honest review*

Series: Holiday Café series, book 1. I can’t wait to read more from this series. I want as many holiday romances as I can get: Christmas, New Year’s, Valentine’s Day, hell I’ll even take a Columbus Day romance if it takes place at the Holiday Café!

Should you read it? Just do it already!

Smut Level: Don’t let the kindergarten teacher and perfect father bit throw you. There are some deliciously descriptive sex scenes in here, and one even employs the use of neck-ties.

Dirty Trick by Christine Bell

The Halloween season is upon us! Although, can you really call it a season? I was gonna say Holiday, but that didn’t seem right either. Festivities? Anyway, it’s almost Halloween, so to celebrate I decided to dedicate my posts for the week to romance novels featured around the creepy day. After all, nothing screams romance like costumes and trick-or-treating. To kick things off, here’s Dirty Trick!

Oh my, dirty indeed. The “dirty trick” referred to in this title actually has two dirty trickmeanings. The first is our male lead, whose name is Patrick, but he goes by Trick for short, and he has a dirty little mind, that rascal. Ok, I’d like to take a time out here and point out that Trick has got to be one of the douchiest nicknames I’ve ever heard. If I met a guy and he said, “Hey, my name is Patrick, but you can call me Trick”, I’d be like, “Ok, bro, sounds good, I’ll check ya on the flip side, know what I’m saying? Now get the hell outta my way.” Alright, rant finished. The second meaning of the title is that Trick (ugh, what a dumbass name) plays a dirty trick on his best friend Grace, who he’s had a major crush on for ages. She thinks they should just be friends, so he comes up with the plan to wear a costume at a Halloween party which will conceal his identity, and show her that they have a sexual chemistry which goes beyond the lines of friendship. See, he’s a dirty little rascal.

This book was published by Entangled:Brazen, and I have found that whenever you’re in the mood for a quick sexy romance, you are almost guaranteed to find a good one here. Now, this romance definitely had it’s flaws, which I will proceed to outline below, but you’ve got friends who are neighbors that decide to begin a sexual relationship full of dirty talk. What’s not to like? And holy monkeys can these two talk dirty. Well, he can anyway. She has some trouble getting the hang of it in the beginning. Unless of course you find it sexy for a woman to ask her lover to put his cockadoodle in her lady business area. No joke, that’s a direct quote.

My main problems with this book were the logistics of it. Firstly, Trick dons an intricate Halloween mask to appear before Grace as a stranger, so that they can flirt with each other and go a few rounds of hanky panky before eventually revealing his true identity. The guy is your best friend, who also happens to live next door to you, and you have no idea that he’s the one behind the mask? It’s sort of like a superhero scenario. He even adopts a Batman-like voice to try and fool her, but come on already! Wake up and smell the hummus! Mmm, hummus. Now, I can sort of understand how she might not know it was him if they were in a crowded party, it was dark, he had his mask, etc. But eventually they go to a well-lit secluded area to be alone, and she even meets him on another day to do things in a movie theater that you aren’t supposed to do there, and she still has no idea it’s him. The author did try to describe her as a very trusting person, so there was an attempt to make the situation seem more plausible, but I’m still not buying it.

And now for the more concerning issue: when Grace meets this sexy “stranger” at the Halloween party, after only about 5 minutes of chatting they wander off to a secluded sauna (you know, because they are in a mansion that has a sauna) and proceed to have hot, sweaty sex while he’s still wearing his mask. At one point she even tried to take the mask off, but he insisted on keeping it on. Honey, there are only two reasons a guy wouldn’t want to take off his mask during sex 1) he’s terribly scarred, or 2) he wants to make sure you would never be able to identify him in a police lineup! Again, if it was just the one foray into the unknown with a stranger I might be able to understand it, but when they meet for a second time at the movie theater he is wearing a hoodie which hides his face in shadow, and he won’t take it off. GAH! This girl is so trusting she would probably follow a serial killer with a knife into the woods because he said he saw Bambi.

Logistical flaws aside, I actually really liked the story-line. You know me, I’m a sucker for a romance about two friends who become more. Grace had always been attracted to Trick, but always thought of him as a player. Granted, his dirty trick sort of reinforces that assumption, but he just wanted to show her that they belonged together. So cute! Sure, Grace is pissed when she finally discovers the truth, but we all know they’ll get together eventually. I mean, he’s her best friend 🙂 He’s also a member of a SWAT team, which is just so freakin’ sexy.

Series: Perfectly Matched series, book 1. I must say I am intrigued for the second book, as it involves Grace’s colleague who always seems to speak her mind.

Should you read it? I finished it in a day, so it’s a quick read, and it might even put you in the Halloween spirit. Maybe even inspire you to play a dirty trick of your own 😉

Smut Level: We’ve got sauna sex, dirty talk, movie theater shenanigans, more dirty talk, and some sweet sweet lovin. Like I said, it just screams Halloween.

Get it on Amazon: Click Here

The Dare by Rachel van Dyken

Well…that was disappointing. Definitely my least favorite book in “The Bet” series, even though it probably had the most potential of all three. My biggest problem with this book was following the logic behind many of the characters’ decision-making. Mainly because it was void of all logic.the dare

Beth has always been described by others as boring. In fact, it’s her unofficial nickname: boring Beth. I’d like to take a moment here to say that if anybody tried to give me that nickname I’d smack ’em upside the head. But anyway, Beth is boring. Until she wakes up one morning after a friend’s wedding to find a sexy senator tangled up in the bed sheets next to her, and no recollection of what went down the night before. So unfortunate. First time the girl has some fun in her life and she can’t even remember the details.

Our sexy senator is Jace, and he and Beth actually have a bit of a history, although neither one is very willing to talk about it. This really ticked me off because it is undoubtedly the most romantic aspect of the entire book. The two met at Beth’s prom years before, but because they went to different schools they didn’t really know each other. Beth had actually been asked to prom by the hunk of the high school, but it was more an act of charity than anything else. While she’s sulking in a corner, a handsome stranger approaches her asking for a dance. Enter Jace. Whereas all of her classmates made fun of her and thought she was boring, Jace found her to be beautiful when nobody else did. Good God I think I need a tissue! The two teens shared a brief kiss on the dance floor before Jace hurried off into the night, and it was years before the two were reunited. See what I mean? Definite potential. Sadly, the author chooses to sort of leave this amazing back-story by the wayside, so it doesn’t get the full amount of attention that it really deserves.

Ok, so that was their past, now let’s get to their present. This has got to be one of the more confusing relationships I’ve ever encountered. The book is entitled The Dare, but to this day I really don’t get what the whole dare was about. Basically, Beth dares Jace to give her “the fairytale” for one week while they are stuck at a couple’s retreat (don’t even ask). Now, what that fairytale is, I have no idea. In my opinion, “the fairytale” would involve lots of hot monkey sex with the hunkenstein that you’ve thought about since high school. Although taking a break now and then to soak up some sun wouldn’t be too bad either. Oh, and maybe a back massage. But apparently Beth’s idea of a fairytale involves no sex at all. Just some steamy kissing, a bit of rubbing, and no relief whatsoever. They get frustrated, I get frustrated, and we don’t see any real action until the last freakin’ chapter of the book.

I understand that in most romance novels the two main lovey doveys can sometimes be hesitant to begin a relationship. That is the case in this book as well, but their reasons for not wanting to start something make no sense at all! Jace keeps saying that he knows he’ll just walk away from her eventually, and that he has to choose between Beth and his career. Umm, definitely missed something here. Firstly, Jace isn’t a player, so I don’t see why he’d walk away. It’s not like he has a history of leaving behind a trail of broken-hearted females. Secondly, somebody please tell this idiot that nowhere in the senator handbook does it say that you can’t have a girlfriend. When another character told Jace that he was basically being a major douche I wanted to crawl into the book for some fist bump action. There were so many pointless discussions in this book about walking away, and making the big gesture to show that he cared. You know what’s a big gesture? Leaving your pity party and just having sex already!

This book did have some humor in it with the character of Grandma Nadine. She has been the not so behind-the-scenes puppet master matchmaker in each book of this series, and she’s crazier than ever in this one. I did find myself giggling a few times while reading this book, but it was usually accompanied by some massive eye-rolling. Grandma Nadine’s antics were just so over-the-top, and not in a good way. I mean I’m all for bringing together two lonely people for the sake of love, but when you have to resort to using the date rape drug to accomplish that you might be overstepping your bounds a little bit. We are supposed to just laugh it off as another silly ploy by Grandma Nadine, but it sounds like her medication might need some adjustment.

Series: The Bet series, book 3.

Should you read it? I pray that this is the last book of the series, but if it isn’t I can tell you that it’s definitely the last one I’m gonna bother reading. Honestly, the whole series can probably be skipped.

Smut Level: Every time things started to get hot and heavy our lovebirds would get interrupted. I grunted from annoyance one too many times.

Get it on Amazon: Click Here

Sudden Response by R.L. Mathewson

Oh my God, this book was so goddamn refreshing I don’t even know what to do with myself! There were no billionaires, naughty spankings, sex contracts or people in desperate need of therapy anywhere near this thing. Just two friends who have been straddling the line of becoming something more for years.sudden response

Josephine and Eric have been friends since they were kids, and now that they are all grown up they work together as EMTs. They have an easy rapport back and forth which is adorably hilarious, and I think I had a stupid grin on my face for about 85% of the book. It can’t really be called flirting, but it’s something more than just a brother/sister type of relationship, which would just be gross. The sexual tension between these two has been set to a slow simmer for too long, and eventually it reaches a boiling point that is delicious to behold.

Something that I really enjoyed about this book was that these two life-long friends have been attracted to each other for years. I feel like with most romance novels where friends become lovers, it’s almost as if they just wake up one day and are like, “Oh, you’re hot. Never noticed that before. Wanna have sex?”. However, in Sudden Response these two lovebirds have always pushed their sexual attraction to each other aside so as not to risk their amazing friendship, or working relationship. Silly rabbits, don’t you know that never works? Eric in particular always tried to avoid getting involved with Josephine because he realizes that he hasn’t had the best dating record with women, and would hate to hurt her. Poor guy simply needed to understand that the reason it never worked out with other women is because they were nothing like Josephine. AWE!!! Isn’t that just the sweetest thing that you’d find in a Hallmark card?

This book does sort of string you along to when Eric and Josephine finally do the dirty deed. It definitely teases you throughout with lingering stares, flirty banter, and even a close call on a kitchen table (so not sanitary). Normally, as most of you know, this irritates me to no end. If I have to wait longer than 50% of the book for the lovers to finally get to the lovin’, I tend to deduct some review points. However, I must say this book was an exception to the rule. True, Eric and Josephine don’t practice their own version of mouth to mouth until about 60%, but this book was such a funny and quick read that I didn’t even mind. And of course, once they do get together it is oh so wonderful, and they have quite a few sexually repressed fantasies they both want to act out in explicit detail. Bring it!

It’s official, not only did I love this book, but I can say without a doubt that I am a fan of R.L. Mathewson. The only books I had read of hers up until this point were from the “Neighbor From Hell” series, which I absolutely love. After reading this book I can see that she can create the perfect blend of humor and romance in practically any project she undertakes. I’m definitely hooked, and can’t wait to read more from her.

Series: It says it is, but I think Goodreads is lying to me. This book was published back in 2011, and still doesn’t have a sequel, which is just sad because Josephine has a brother that I’d love to hear more about.

Should you read it? If you don’t like this book then I honestly don’t know what to do with you.

Smut Level: I feel like I need to put myself in an emergency situation just so I can get a sexy EMT like Eric. Hubba hubba.

Get it on Amazon: Click Here

Throwback to the beginning

For this throwback Thursday I decided to go back and share my first ever book review post, From Rags by Suzanne Wright. Why, you ask? Mainly because I’m not sure anybody actually saw it. No likes and no comments make me a sad panda 😦 Another reason I’m throwbacking to this review is because I absolutely loved the book, and I highly recommend it for any of you looking for a fun and sexy read. So without further ado, enjoy!

Originally posted July 28, 2014.

This book is amazeballs! It contains all of the elements for my conception of the perfect romance novel: long lost friends, an alpha male, and a strong female lead who doesn’t take no crap from nobody. from rags

Jaxxon is a young woman who refuses to let anyone walk all over her. She’s tough, something she had to become as a youngster after her mother committed suicide, and her sister ran away. Her one real friend from foster care, Connor, also left her behind. Jaxxon quickly learned that she can’t rely on anyone in life except for herself. Despite the fact that she completely lost contact with Connor after he left her, she eventually comes to see him everywhere; on television and magazine covers that is. You see, Connor has grown up to become a famous Formula One driver. Don’t they all? She never thought their paths would cross again, but when Jaxxon is thrust into stardom after being offered a modelling job, she is contacted one day by her old friend Connor. Imagine his surprise when instead of welcoming him with open arms, she basically tells him to piss off. Little does she know, Connor won’t take no for an answer. Oh my.

The sexual chemistry between these two is off the charts, and don’t even get me started on the sex itself. Hot damn, I need some ice water over here! Jaxxon and Connor are an amazing couple. They are both pigheaded, stubborn, love to swear and are therefore perfect for each other. Although this book is highly sexual in nature, it’s also funny and yet intense as well. Jaxxon tells it like it is, which is so refreshing in this type of genre. Normally our heroines are shy creatures who are sometimes unsure of their sexuality, or faint when the wind blows too hard, but Jaxxon just goes for it. You don’t want to get in her way. The intensity of the book comes from the fact that Jaxxon has a stalker, and Connor has an ex-girlfriend that simply doesn’t want to go away. Are you intrigued yet?

The story line of this novel is very addictive, from stalkers to long lost love, and even the back story between our two main characters. Jaxxon might be tough, but she’s also fragile and has difficulty letting anyone get close to her, convinced that they will just leave her in the end. After all, that’s what everyone she’s ever loved has done before. The fact that one of the people she loved most in this world has come back into her life throws her for a loop. Can she trust him again, considering that he left her once before? So freakin’ awesome! This is another one of those books that I wish was turned into a series, or at least had a sequel. I want to find out what happens next!!

Series: Nope 😦

Should you read it: Absolutely

Smut Level: So smutty it might even be too hot for the beach.

Get it on Amazon: Click Here

Adoptive Personality by Cassandra Scearce

Umm…what just happened? Anyone? Oh yeah, my mind was just blown all over the freakin’ walls, and I have a feeling I’ll still be picking up the pieces a month from now. When I finished the last page of this book my jaw literally dropped down to my chest. Let me put it to you this way: I have read a ridiculous number of books, have watched countless hours of TV, and have a movie collection that is just obnoxious. I have therefore read or seen practically every possible ending to a story imaginable, and it takes a lot to shock me. But this book succeeded in doing so, and then some.adoptive personality

Eve has been physically and sexually abused by her father for years while her mother just stood by and watched. He has forced her to have an abortion, and even pimped her out as payment for his own debts. Eve has had enough, and decides one night to murder her mother and father by burning their house down. Have I caught your attention? Well, just wait for the twist. After succeeding in her murder plan, Eve soon discovers that her “parents” had adopted her when she was just a baby. She then starts out on a plan of revenge against the birth mother who gave her up all those years ago.

Honestly, it was very difficult to get past the first 5 pages of this book. It begins with Eve’s “father” entering her bedroom at night to rape her. I immediately thought, “Cheese and monkeys, what the hell have I gotten myself into.” Perhaps the worst part is that Eve has a photographic memory, which means that all of the scenes in this book of rape and abuse are told in explicit detail. I must say though, I’ve got to tip my hat to the author for her talent of creating such superbly disturbing and disgusting scenes, to the point where it felt like I too was in the room with Eve. Sure, it may have been against my will, but I must give credit where credit is due.

Now, I did question some of Eve’s decision making skills, and believe it or not I’m not talking about her choice to kill her parents. Rather, she seemed to go the difficult route with everything. Let me explain. To find out more about her mother, and why she gave her up for adoption, Eve decides to become a computer hacker and eventually infiltrate the company her mother works for. You know, a simple phone call may have sufficed. Maybe ask the adoption agency what was up? Also, in order to make money for all of her computer hacking equipment she decides to become a stripper, but when that starts to become too time consuming, what with her being in high school and everything, she decides to become a dominatrix. Silly me, when I was in high school I thought babysitting was a good way to earn some extra cash.

The beginning of this book definitely catches your attention with the descriptions of Eve’s abuse at the hands of her father, and the end will absolutely knock your socks off. The middle on the other hand was a little slow in my opinion. It was just too repetitive. She constantly goes through the motions of studying, stripping, dominating, driving go-carts and going to the shooting range. Then she does it all again the next week. The middle of this book also became something of a dirty math equation. Alright boys and girls, if Eve earns $800 for one night of stripping, but gives a 15% cut to the house, then plays dominatrix for an hour to earn $1500, and gives another 15% cut to the madam at the adult toy store, and then spends $500 for an illegal handgun, how much did Eve earn altogether in one evening? I don’t do math folks, especially when underage stripping is involved.

So much of the book was spent explaining how Eve was earning money for her eventual revenge plot that you almost forget why she’s plotting in the first place, and who her target is. Throughout the whole thing, I kept saying to myself, “Okay, where the hell is this thing going, and when is it going to get there.” And then, just like that, it all comes together in practically the last two pages, and you won’t believe what just happened. I finished this book almost a week ago, and I’m still thinking about the ending. Now, something very important to keep in mind is that this is NOT a fairytale ending. There is no riding off into the sunset with a handsome lover boy. Eve is also a very questionable moral character. Sure, we kind of feel her parents got what was coming to them, but in Eve’s revenge against her mother she doesn’t care who she hurts, as long as she succeeds. Overall, I can’t even really say I liked this book because it was so unbelievably dark and disgusting, from the deranged character of Eve’s father (who is definitely burning in hell) to the actions of Eve herself. However, I still have to give it to Cassandra Scearce for creating a piece of work that was so incredibly unique.

*An ARC was provided by the author for an honest review*

Series: Nope

Should you read it? I honestly don’t know. I’ve never read anything like it before, but it’s dark, nasty, and you’ll probably need to watch a cartoon after reading it so you can feel joy again.

Smut Level: Disturbingly graphic

Update 9/29/14 at 11:30pm: After much thought I can officially say I liked this book. It may sound crazy, but that ending just floored me.

Am I Supposed to Find this Sexy?

As you all know, I read a lot of smut. I can’t help it, I find it interesting. You name it, I’ve probably read it: new adult, contemporary romance, historical romance, erotica, bdsm. The common theme of the horizontal mambo running rampant throughout all of them. I’ve also read all manner of couples getting together and finding love: friends, enemies, co-workers, neighbors, rich and poor, celebrities and average nobodies. I’ve read ’em all, and I’ll admit that I like ’em all. However, there is one couple group that I simply can’t decide if I find sexy, or disgusting. That would be the step-siblings.

fallen too farThere are some romance novels, such as Fallen Too Far by Abbi Glines, or Picture Perfect by Evangeline Anderson, where we have a step-brother and step-sister who can’t deny their sexual attraction to each other. Personally, whenever I read about this kind of romance I can’t help but get an initial feeling of ickiness. Now, I know they aren’t biologically related, and to be fair, normally whenever we have this kind of relationship the two have just recently met, or have known each other very briefly. I guess that makes it a little bit better, right? It’s not like they’ve lived together for years, and grown up together as brother and sister.

But still, am I the only one who finds this a little bit creepy? I mean, what are you supposed to say to your parents? “Hey dad, I totally get why you married this one if sexual libido happens to be a family trait, you know what I mean? High-five!” Pardon me whilst I go into the corner and puke. That’s also a feature which is usually notably absent from many of these romances: the parents’ reaction. Probably because there isn’t any way to address it in a non-awkward manner! What is the parent supposed to say? “I always hoped you two would get along”. Ugh, just no. So wrong.

Icky Face

I have read a few books now with this step-sibling theme, and I just don’t know how to feel about it. Normally they are pretty good reads, as there is the element of the forbidden in them. I mean, I absolutely loved Fallen Too Far. But I always had to remind myself in the end that this budding romance was between two people whose parent’s had a legal marriage certificate. I don’t know, what do you all think? Is it sexy for step-siblings to fall in love, or will there always be the ick factor that just won’t go away?

 

Love Hacked by Penny Reid

Sadly, I’d have to say that this was my least favorite Knitting in the City book to date. After the second novel in the series I was really hoping that we were headed towards an upward trajectory of awesomeness, but after a while I was just so frustrated with the plot of this book that I couldn’t wait for it to end already.love hacked

In the 2nd Knitting in the City novel we were briefly introduced to Sandra Fielding, who seemed like a free-spirit, so I was really interested to read her story in the series. The premise of the novel also caught my eye, considering that Sandra probably has a worse first-date record than I do. Because she is a therapist, the majority of her dates find her remarkably easy to talk to, eventually revealing their sad tales of woe and ending the date in tears. On the guy’s side anyway. Sandra is extremely frustrated that she may never find the perfect guy. Enter Alex, hot waiter extraordinaire.

At first, Alex seems like the perfect order of tall, dark and yummy. I mean, his voice is dripping with sex, and he works in an Indian restaurant, which means he would constantly smell like butter chicken. Um, sign me up please! The two love birds also engage in some steamy kissing, and Alex is extremely possessive, which is definitely a point in his favor. Ok, so he may be on parole for committing a federal crime, be a bit paranoid about the NSA following him, and have slightly stalkerish tendencies. He’s also a virgin. So…yeah.

This book had so much potential, but unfortunately the side-plot annoyed me yet again, and this time to unprecedented levels of frustration. In the beginning, Alex seemed enticingly mysterious, but then he just got more mysterious, and extremely secretive, and I just wanted to sit on his head while he confessed to what the hell was going on! All of the build-up makes it seem like his secret is the be all end all of secrets. Did he kill somebody? Is he really a woman? Is he smarter than a 5th grader? Spoiler alert: the secret is that he invented bitcoins. I’ve got some serious eye-roll happening here.

I’m going to sound like an idiotic, simplistic, Midwestern hick here (hey, it’s who I am), but who the hell cares if Alex invented bitcoins?! First of all, I don’t think I’m the only person here who doesn’t completely understand the purpose or function of bitcoins. I mean, heck, Sandra couldn’t wrap her head around it either, and she’s a smart cookie. Therefore, why the hell would you have the plot of your novel center around such a complex idea when most people reading the book probably won’t grasp the full impact of such a big reveal? Secondly, the way that Sandra decides to avoid having to testify against Alex was so unbelievably stupid I almost threw my Kindle against the wall. But then I realized how expensive such a move would be and decided against it. Ok, so Sandra discovers that Alex invented bitcoins, and he is fearful that the NSA would force her to testify against him. Why they would bring him to trial for simply having invented bitcoins is completely beyond me, but I just don’t care at this point. The only way to avoid having her testify is if she were his priest, his therapist, or his wife. So what does she do? She decides to marry him. Ummmm, you are a therapist, and you completely bypass that line of thinking?! GRRR!!!

And now for the main reason I didn’t really care for this book. Where the heck were my knitting ladies?! They were practically absent from the whole novel, and only engaged in the tiniest bit of shenanigans at the end of the book. Come on! Throw me a freakin’ bone here. If you are going to delay the main characters from having sex until the last half of the novel (yet again!), at least let me enjoy the hilariousness of the knitting group. If I don’t have that I have nothing 😦

Series: Knitting in the City, book 3

Should you read it? If you understand the intricacies of bitcoins, feel free to give it a go.

Should you try to explain to me the intricacies of bitcoins? For the love of all that is holy in this world, please don’t.

Smut Level: Delayed gratification is a theme in this series. You don’t see any lovin’ until after the half-way point, and even then it isn’t too smutty.

Buy it on Amazon: Click Here

Rush by Maya Banks

For those of you who follow my blog regularly (thank you by the way), you may remember that a few posts ago I held a poll concerning which book I should read next. Well this book won by a landslide!

Now I know that in a previous post I mentioned that my new life plan was to travel toRush London to snatch up a character from one of my reviews. Well, that plan’s out the window. I now have a new goal. Wanna hear it? Well too bad, you’re gonna hear it anyway! So my new goal in life is to travel to New York City, become a secretary for a big company, wait about a week, and have a brooding billionaire with a heart of gold fall in love with me. Because according to the vast majority of contemporary romance novels out there, Rush included, I’ve got about a 98% chance of this actually happening. Then I can buy my villa in the south of France and enjoy my piece of man candy at the same time. Oh, and maybe buy a panda.

Mia has known Gabe Hamilton for years. After all, he’s her brother’s closest friend and business partner. She’s also had a major crush on him since he first entered her life all those years ago. Gabe may be 14 years older than Mia, but when she struts into a party looking all provocative in a barely there dress (and her brother is conveniently absent), he decides to finally make his move and bring Mia into his world of pleasure.

To be honest, when I first started reading this book, I was a little worried that you all had led me astray. Why, you ask? Because in the beginning this plot followed practically line by line Fifty Shades of Grey. And we all know how I feel about that little piece of literature. We’ve got a sexy, untrusting billionaire who sets his sights on an innocent blushing beauty, and decides to have her sign a sexual contract which includes, but is not limited to, bondage, physical pain, and basically obeying his every wish. What is it with these billionaires and their sex treaties? Can’t you just meet a nice girl and take her to dinner and a movie like a normal person? I mean, talk about an awkward conversation. Gee Mia, you look nice tonight, now will you sign on the dotted line to become my sexual play thing? Thanks doll, you’re a peach. Also, why do these dudes always have to be billionaires? What, being a millionaire is just too low class nowadays?

Despite it’s similarities to Fifty Shades of Tomfoolery, there were some various elements which set Rush apart in a good way.

  1. Mia immediately admits to herself that this sex contract thing is absolutely ridiculous. It’s stupid, pretty demeaning, and completely out of character for her. But she also sets some ground rules with the contract so that Gabe can’t completely walk all over her.
  2. Gabe enjoys some elements of BDSM, but he declares outright that this isn’t because of some psychological trauma from his childhood, or because his parents weren’t in a loving relationship. According to him, it’s just a kink. Finally! A billionaire who doesn’t need therapy. He also tells Mia that they don’t need a safe-word, he understands that no means no. Awww, such a gentleman.
  3. The majority of the plot deals with Mia discovering this new world of sexual pleasure with Gabe. AKA, there isn’t a whole lot of plot (just like Fifty Shades). However! There is the whole element of them hiding their relationship from her brother, which I kind of liked. You know, the whole forbidden fruit idea.

The ending to this book was pretty awkward, but adorable as well. Let’s just say that Mia’s brother eventually finds out about her secret relationship with Gabe. He walks in on them in a rather compromising position. A blindfold and riding crop may have been involved. Ugh, I can’t even imagine the humiliation. I’d change my name and move to Bermuda. That being said, the very very end of the book is just so darn cute. It’s like Fifty Shades of Grey and the Hallmark Channel had a love child. Even though it didn’t really fit with the whole erotic tone of the rest of the book, it was a toe-curl inducing ending.

Series: Breathless series, book 1. I must say I am intrigued to read the other books in the series which deal with Mia’s brother, and another close friend in the billionaire group.

Should you read it? It’s not a must read, but it’s a good read.

Smut Level: Holy dirty talkers, these two have years of sexual tension to work off. I just hope they stay hydrated. Consider yourself warned that this book almost crosses the line at times into full on inappropriate territory. Almost.

Buy it on Amazon: Click Here

Insomnia by Bethany Bazile

This was the basic play-by-play as I read this book: mkay, hot dude has issues sleeping, goes to a therapist, they have some sex on her desk, dirty talk, possessiveness, some more dirty talk, book is almost over, not many difficulties encountered, hmm I wonder what’s gonna…holy crap cliffhanger!!Beuatiful men relaxing naked in bed

Xander Pierce is a hot Hollywood stud, who for some reason has trouble sleeping. The reasons behind his insomnia are never revealed to us, which was kind of annoying, but the book was really short, so it wasn’t too trying on my romance nerves. The only thing which helps him fall asleep is sex, so he has it…a lot. One of his sex partners suggests he speak with a therapist to tackle the underlying issue, so he gives in, thinking that he’ll find someone to give him some drugs to help knock him out. Tee hee, oh you naive little thing.

Avery has some secrets of her own, again which we never truly uncover, but we do know that she’s an orphan, and her only real family is her foster sister. She hasn’t had sex in over 3 years, until of course sexy man Xander comes for a therapy visit. Avery tries to keep things purely professional and avoid the electricity streaming between them, but she simply can’t resist his smolder, dimples, or numerous eyebrow lifts.

Not only did Xander know that Avery would eventually succumb to his sexual innuendos and suggestions, but we as the audience knew it as well. It’s only a matter of time. And when that time comes, it’s rough, hot, and sadly pretty quick. After so much build up from her continuously denying him I expected a little more foreplay, but they just went for it. Oh well. Xander is also a pretty big dirty talker, even when they aren’t having sex. He’s not afraid to say what he wants…or text what he wants for that matter.

I had no idea going into this novel that it was a cliffhanger. In hindsight, it probably would have been better to know ahead of time, because I was so confused as to why nothing really significant had happened almost 95% through the novel. I mean, yeah they had sex, but we still hadn’t discovered what plagued Xander’s nightmares, or what exactly happened in Avery’s past to make her so untrustworthy of others. The cliffhanger takes place at the very end of the novel, I’m talking last page here, and it was a big one. I think my jaw even dropped down to my chin. Now you know I’m not going to spoil it for you, so if you want to find out what it is you’ll just have to read it for yourself. Don’t worry, it should only take you about an hour or 2 to read, it’s so short. I can’t wait to read the next book, because although this first one was really sexy, I’m excited for there to be more of a storyline than just the sexual chemistry between the two main characters.

Series: Sexual Misconduct series, book 1

Should you read it? It’s not the most mind-blowing piece of literature, but it’s sexy, and it’s a really quick read.

Smut Level: So dirty, you might have to take a shower, a cold one that is.

Buy it on Amazon: Click Here